Since moving out to live on my own I’ve had a lot of opportunities to explore clothing and build up a wardrobe that I love. I can’t even count the number of hours I spent walking through shops and their sale sections in real life, let alone the hours spent scrolling online shops. Once I discovered Depop, there was yet another place to find clothing and spend money, and the ability to sell items I didn’t love, which pushed me further into the cycle of buying and reselling clothing at a loss.

I couldn’t say that I have my style pinned down 100%. In reality, style is something that fluctuates over time. Personal preferences, body shape, age, trends, jobs requirements and your everyday lifestyle needs all contribute to personal style and are things that will change as time goes on. Does that mean that you should just give up?

Absolutely not! Self expression and dressing in a way that makes you feel good about yourself is worth chasing after.

The following advice will hopefully spare you some time, effort, and money in developing your own style and wardobe. A key aspect of this is reducing the number of tries before you find a piece of clothing that sticks around in your wardrobe for years to come.

Video format

I first put together this information in a video on my YouTube channel (which you can watch below) or if you prefer to read, scroll past to get to the good bit!

1. Stop engaging with trends

Trends can be fun to take part in for sure. The damage comes when there is a fear of missing out and you feel like it’s absolutely necessary to take part in every single one.

Other than the cost of buying into every trend, there is potentially an emotional cost in the cases where the trend isn’t a perfect fit for you. It looks great on influencers on your social feeds, it looks awesome on the model on the website, the clothing looks gorgeous on the hanger - but when you put it on it just doesn’t have the same wow factor. A lot of the time it’s because it doesn’t look that great on everyone without some sort of adjustment or tailoring. An example of misrepresentation is below - both the pose and the clips make the dress look different!

This image from a Daily Mail article shows ASOS forgot to photoshop out clips on the model. Meaning there are probably clips and specific poses for every other item!

At the same time, no trend is going to perfectly fit every single person. We have so many different body types, comfort levels, insecurities, and requirements of our clothing that it is just not possible to meet with a single trend. And that’s okay!

Since the trend cycle seems to be getting shorter and shorter, clothing brands are under a tight deadline to make and sell you the clothing before it’s no longer in style. This time challenge means that corners are cut in the manufacturing process and the overall quality of clothing is a lot worse than in previous decades. That’s a general effect of fast fashion by design, resulting in us needing to buy more clothing more often when the old items inevitably fall apart. Clothing cannot be cheap and well made at the same time.

Microtrends specifically contribute a lot to this. A lot of us will have seen the House of Sunny dress that picked up a lot of attention on TikTok. In a matter of weeks there were “inspired” dresses and outright knockoffs available for people to buy at a lower price point. And a few months later there was no sign of anyone wearing the dress anymore.

So by only engaging in the trends that stand out to you and your personal tastes, there will be fewer items in your wardrobe that you wear once and then forget about.

2. Find fashion inspiration - from sources that aren’t trying to sell you things

Inspiration is wonderful to have around you. It can lead you to make discoveries and explore things you might never have considered. However, when you’re consistently seeing content that pushes you to buy things there is a question of authenticity.

We know that an influencer’s job is to push you towards buying products or services from the brands they partner with. When creators have a genuine love for what they’re promoting it’s a win-win situation - you buy a recommended product that makes your life better in some way, and they make money from the interaction. But in the cases of influencers promoting items they don’t believe in simply to make money or get free items, their audience can end up feeling like they lost out or were lied to. This can be anything from makeup and cosmetics, to clothing, to furniture and decor, or even trips abroad.

Sourcing ideas from people that keep pushing products will most likely influence the average person to spend money on things they wouldn’t have otherwise. And if the item arrives and isn’t quite up to the standard the inspiration made it look like it was, that’s money lost and another item to get rid of in the worst case.

In my experience, taking an objective look at who you follow on social media and figuring out if they genuinely value the products they promote can be useful in making your feed a better experience. Do they ever wear the clothes they promoted in another grid post or story? Are they selling the item they were gifted on Depop? Have they ever mentioned the product before they were paid to?

Unfollowing these inauthentic influencers, or at least taking their posts with a pinch of salt, means that you might buy fewer things you won’t wear.

3. Shop around to find the Perfect item

I don’t think there has ever been a time where the first instance of a style or trend that I saw was the Perfect item for me. Trends and styles trickle down through different brands and that means there are a lot of different variations of a single idea.

I didn’t realise this until surprisingly recently, but every person has different needs for their clothes. Maybe there’s a specific insecurity they want to cover up. Maybe they prefer a more modest style, a specific fabric, or have sensory issues. For practical reasons someone might avoid a certain type of fastening or fabric they can’t stand. Maybe pockets are a non-negotiable. Individual preferences for all of the aspects of a single item of clothing build up to requirements.

Too often I have bought a top and found out it was a little bit too cropped for me to wear comfortably so I had to sell it on. Sometimes it’s that I don’t like the zip or the buttons but everything else is okay. Even one major thing being off about an item of clothing could mean that you never wear it again so taking the time to look around and find the version of an item that works best for you will ensure that all (or most) of your personal requirements are met. Hopefully this means that the clothes will actually be worn and loved because they do exactly what you need.

A way to get this is to shop around, get an item tailored, or even make a garment yourself.

4. Look through old outfits for timeless items

It feels like every sustainability focussed person out there says that the key to a sustainable and long lasting wardrobe is sourcing “timeless” items. But what does that really mean?

I think timelessness is different in everyone’s eyes. Just like our personal style and preferences, opinions on what will look good in 20 years aren’t going to be the same for everyone. And while there are people making their personal recommendations (funny how a lot of those products are shared through affiliate links) that doesn’t mean that it matches what you like.

A good way to figure out what timeless means to you is to take a look through old photos and videos, and see what you would wear today! It could be your old photos, family photos of when your relatives were younger, old movies and music videos, old magazines… the list goes on. If there are clothes or looks that you wouldn’t consider old or out of trend than there’s a good chance you’ll still like them years in the future.

This can help identify what works for you and things you might want to look out for in the future.

5. Experiment with everything!

How will you know how something looks without trying it on?

It’s super easy to make bold assumptions that something will look bad on you based only on what it looks like on the hanger. But unless you’ve tried on every possible cut and version of every style of a garment, you’re not going to be right a significant portion of the time.

Things to try out include:

colours
textures
fabrics
lengths
sleeves
necks
styles you’ve never tried before
things you tried in the past but don’t know if you’ll love or hate it now
clothes that looked different when your body didn’t look the way it does now

Granted, it’s a lot more difficult to see if clothes from online stores will fit you. There is also the issue of returned items going to landfill instead of being returned to stock that is then sold to someone who will value it.

I buy all of my clothes secondhand where possible, mainly on Depop and Vinted. Since I have been selling on these platforms for a few years now, it’s always an option to list an item that doesn’t quite work and hope that someone else will buy it. I also get some money back from this. However, there’s no guarantee that someone will buy the item or that you’ll make all of your money back. So some other options include giving items to friends and family, clothing swaps with your community, and donating to shelters or organisations that give clothes to people who need them.

The ideal scenario of trying on items in physical stores or swapping clothing with friends and others would allow you to try out everything you could think of, and discover something new that you love.

6. Find what you love

Speaking of things you love, have you noticed that (other than uniforms or work clothes) the most worn items of clothing tend to be things we love the most?

It could be your favourite soft tshirt that you’ve had for years and years. Maybe it’s the perfect fitting pair of jeans that will live on in your wardrobe even with some rips and tears and stains that won’t quite come out. It’s quite likely that you have some garments you absolutely love and will take every opportunity to wear.

So it figures that we should figure out what we love, and then find more of it!

Whether it’s a certain aesthetic, style, cut, colour scheme or fabric that calls to you, identifying exactly what you love could help you find out more about your personal style. At the same time, filling your wardrobe with clothes you love will hopefully mean that you’ll actually want to wear them.

7. Seek out unique or rare items

A bit of an observation: people with a really distinctive style tend to wear clothing that is unique. Limited editions, one-offs, or generally more rare clothing can help you express your personal style and stand out because noone else will have the item.

Some ways you can find these special items is to look through vintage shops (online and in person), charity and thrift shops, go through friends and family’s old clothing, customise existing clothes, or make something completely new yourself.

On the topic of customisation, consider:

tie dye
embroidery
patches
screen printing
painting
flipping items - tailor, cut, redesign your own or thrifted clothes

Painting clothes can be fun and fairly low cost

If you don’t have the time, resources, or skill to take this on yourself there are lots of talented artists out there that can help you out. Wearing someone’s art is a great way to support them. Some people even offer handmade custom clothing suited to your specifications. The main thing is finding their shops.

This extra dimension adds a lot of room for self-expression so it’s worth looking around or having some fun being creative and maybe even learning a new skill.

Final thoughts

These 7 tips are what I wish younger me had known. It takes us all a different timescale and range of experience to figure out life lessons and key information that changes our lives, habits, and views for the better.

If you find this advice helpful I would urge you to share it with someone else and see if maybe they could discover something they hadn’t thought about before.

7 tips for finding your style (and clothes you’ll actually wear)